What Is It With Me And Wierd Neighbors?

September 12th, 2012 | Posted in nutjob hills | Comments Off

That’s right. I’ve got another one. I swear that house next door is cursed. It attracts only the weirdest, strangest people around as tenants. Some of the people living there, most in fact, are surely candidates for chief nut at the local asylum.

Anyway this latest guy seems sort of ok to start with but that was just to start. You know how they say “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover”? Well the same advice about deceptive appearances and first impressions also applies to neighbors. Especially around here it seems.

The first sign of strangeness was when he started trying really hard to convince me to get into yoga. The oddball part of it is not only is he doing these exercises on his front lawn at five O’clock in the morning, he does them accompanied by some of the hardest rock music I’ve ever heard.

Well, obviously that isn’t going to happen. I haven’t been near that flexible for over twenty years. This of course didn’t stop him. He’s still talking to me about it a couple of times a week.

His latest thing however is shoes. That’s right. I said shoes. It seems that he’s noticed my footwear and he’s made it clear in no uncertain terms that I need to do better. That what I’m wearing now is totally bad for my feet and posture.

He’s gone on to say that he can recommend something much better for me. After which he trotted out a catalog and started showing me a number of very expensive shoes that look totally uncomfortable to me in addition to being out of my price range of ten bucks. When he finally (I thought) got the point about shoes he says “That’s ok, I’ve also got this catalog here for spenco sandals. I’m sure I can find something that you’ll like and will be better for you than those ah, things.”

Once again I had to waste a good half an hour before I finally managed to get him to go away and let me get on with stuff that I’m nearly late finishing.

Did he get a clue? Does he finally understand I’m never going to buy any of the stuff he want’s me to get? Nope. Not a chance. All I did was get him to go away for a few days.

I don’t doubt for a second he’ll be back.

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