I admit that I write a lot about the various nutjobs that live in my area but how can I help it when there are so many of them and they’re all absolutely mad as hatters? And while about three quarters of them couldn’t tell a web browser from a shopping cart if their lives depended on it, I do anonymize the stories enough to maintain their privacy.
And now for the story of nutjob #4396841. This young chap moved to this area within the last year or so and from what I’ve heard, he’s been (mostly) normal enough. Although I have yet to hear any explanation for the two foot tall rubber dog poop that was found on his front lawn last summer.
Recently however I’ve heard what amounts to confirmation that he is, indeed, a nutjob in full and has apparently moved to the right area.
What is his offense you ask? Well, apparently he’s extremely upset because he can’t seem to find a place to buy fireworks. Of course he don’t seem to understand that, around here at least, you can’t buy fireworks at all until about two weeks before the fourth of July. And then only in certain places, usually outside of any city or town limits.
That however isn’t (quite) what confirms his nutjob status. The kicker is the reason he wants them. When asked he replied. “Why, to celebrate Valentine’s day of course.” as if everybody celebrated the 14th of February with fireworks displays.
What a world we live in ‘eh?
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